An Appreciation
Comments 2

Who knew…?

Today is the Feast of the Saints John and Paul.

Don’t ask me which John, or which Paul is being referred to here.
I not know!

They never really get around to telling you those things when they mention these facts.
It seems like I’m just supposed to know… somehow…

It’s also the day that the (alleged) Pied Piper of Hamelin (allegedly) piped 130 children away from the (actual) town to their (alleged) doom.

Now, I’ve always considered this story to be a legend.
Another example of tales created by adults to scare their children into submission.
One of those things that parents say, when they don’t want to (or can’t) come up with a rational reason for the behavior they insist you exhibit.

Like that bit about the monster under your bed, that will grab you if you get up at night.
Or the one about the Boogey Man (apparently, there’s this vicious, scary monster dude type man, lurking around outside at night; with just a wicked sense of rhythm and the feet to pull it off, if the pronunciation of his name is anything to go by…)
Or that one about the people of the middle east greeting us as liberators, just as soon as we seize those weapons of mass destruction…

You know…
Fairy Tales, one and all…

But it seems this particular tale actually might have just gone and done happened.

In the year 1284, on June 26, 130 children disappeared, or were led away, or… something…
From the town of Hamelin, Germany, which is SW-ish of Hanover.
The town’s official records start, in 1384, with the sentence:
“It is 100 years since our children left.”

You might just want to scroll up a bit and replay that first video…

We’ve all heard about the rats…

But the first mention of rats in connection with this story didn’t happen until almost 300 years after fact.
Which means that this dude just (allegedly) waltzed in and (allegedly) took the children, and nobody (allegedly) did anything about it, until finally somebody (allegedly) realized that the town was taking it on the (actual) chin.
So they invented the whole extermination bit… not realizing that it wasn’t really helping their image any to be seen as a bunch of welshers, on a massive, civic scale.

It seems what the middle ages needed more than anything was a good, old-fashioned PR firm…

In the ensuing centuries, all kinds of people have tried to put all kinds of spin on this tale.
Like maybe all the kinder went off to retake the Holy Land for Christendom…
Or they just got a really bad case of wanderlust, and decided to immigrate to Transylvania.

How’d that work out for ya, hmmm…?!?
Out of the Pied Piper Pot and into the Vampire Fire, one would assume…

There’s even one “expert” (bah!) who claims that:
“Well, you know, everyone who lives in a town can be said to be a ‘child’ of that town, and so, they really weren’t children after all, but fully grown adults, just doing what fully grown adults do…”

Oh, so you’re saying it was fully grown adults which were led off to their (alleged) doom?
Like that’s supposed to make us feel better…?

Frickin’ experts…
What we need around here is a lot more of them pied piper fellows, piping the heck right out of all these experts…
Talk about performing a civic duty!!!

So, in honor of that (alleged) story that (allegedly) happened way back when…
Go on out and hug an (actual) rat today.

If you can’t find one of the four-footed variety, any ol’ politician will do…

Make sure you wash up thoroughly afterwards.

After the politician, I mean.

And now…
One more time, for the boys in blue…




Image found here.




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