All posts tagged: laundry

Holly THIS, Frosty…

Can someone please explain to me why the diddly-dad-gum rackum smackum not by the hair of a billy goat’s chinny chin chin am I singing Christmas music inside my head on November the 3rd? Have I lost my mind? “Well, we can’t really say, for sure, Mr. Theory. Medical science has yet to explain the phenomenon of Christmas Music, in any meaningful, medically useful manner – ontologically and methodologically speaking. We’re much too busy making up very long and silly sounding names for the stuff we’ve convinced ourselves we DO understand. We don’t really have the time or the resources to tackle issues of such a dubious and unprofitable nature. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve other patients to attend to. Your bill for these three minutes comes to a grand total of $237,974.06. You can pay on your way out, and we would appreciate exact change. We also accept all major credit cards – first born children, 401K’s – that sort of thing…”

That Jacko’s Quite the Man

“In Jacko’s arms there cannot be fear, there can only be pleasure…” This line is from the blurb for a book released not even two months ago. When I first came across it, it was the one line they were using as the main sell. But I don’t want you to do anything at the moment, except revel in the gloriousness of that sentence. Take a deep breath. Clear your mind of all the day’s stresses and inconveniences. Let go of the sounds that would intrude upon your consciousness. Wipe clean the slate, of everything; even the nasally, grating sound of my own voice. Relax… “In Jacko’s arms there cannot be fear, there can only be pleasure…”