All posts tagged: Snoddly Thumpernickel

Earliest Photograph Ever Found…

Chichen Itza – Yucatan, Mexico AP – In a discovery described as one of the most baffling finds in archeological history, scientists today announced they had uncovered the first known example of photography, created by the Mayan civilization centuries before the technique was discovered elsewhere. “Perhaps we should say centuries before the technique was re-discovered,” said Dr. Snoddly Thumpernickle, lead scientist at the Kato Institute, at a news conference hurriedly arranged to announce the find. Thumpernickle seemed obviously shaken by the news, and at times was at a loss for words. “I mean… what can I say? The state of their painting, and art, at this time in their history was still of a primitive nature. And yet, here we find an actual photograph. That the photograph is of an astronomical nature is certainly in keeping with the accepted reason for many of the buildings to have been built in the first place.” In reply to questions concerning the authenticity of the photo, or what the Mayans might have used as emulsifiers, in an age when chemistry was an unknown …

Philosophy 101, Pt. I

In an opinion piece in the December 8th edition of the NY Times, entitled “Know Thyself – Really”, a philosopher named Quassim Cassam from the UK goes to some lengths to differentiate between what he calls ‘substantial’ self-knowledge and ‘trivial’ self-knowledge. The article can be found here. First of all, I’ll need to get something out of my system, before we can proceed. Trust me on this one – it’ll be better for all concerned, if I just go ahead and do it now. I’m not saying any antisocial tendencies will thus be fully assuaged. But it’ll make it easier to get to the bulk of the above article in a more intelligent (and less childish) manner. Those of you impatient for the, almost surely, more scintillatingly existentialist thoughts to come, should probably just skip right on to Pt. II… Cause this may take a while… Where is Part II, you ask? I haven’t written it yet… Whatever… On with the show. Now… are you kidding me? Really? A philosopher… named Quassim Cassam? (gesundheit!) That… …

HELLOOoooOO, HALLOWEEN

The only photograph thought to exist, of the creature formerly known as: Snoddly Thumpernickel A SYLVAN TALE OF HORROR An original fantasy in long form It occurred back in the year of eighteen-ought-three, Deep in the murk-some woods of Mashamoquet. If you’d have the tale, then pause while I sit, and Speak of the Cabbage Patch Kid, who lived in a tree. Yeah. You know, that’s not really doing it for me. I’d wanted to do a frightening kind of Halloween-type blockbuster poem. Something epic, to endear me to the hearts of those people who like to have their hearts pounding, around this time of the year. A work of monumental proportions, combining many diverse themes – themes both classic and those more obscure. Something colossal; like the following ambitious, larger-than-life and rather impressive diagram:   [You wanna talk about horror – you try spending an hour or so mocking something like this up in WordPress, and then hit ‘Save Draft’ – and see if you don’t find yourself screaming rather impressively in horror.]